A Senshi's Temper
by Beloved Dawn
Summary: Because even Armageddon has to have a reason. And no one can say he didn't deserve it anyways...


_Ha HA! The inspriration for this came to me while I was working on my only chaptered story so far. Couldn't resist. Let me know what you think. I mean, this all had to come around somehow, right? Plus I was considering the appropriateness of Saturn's god for her job. Didn't make as much sense as the others, but we can blame the ancient Greeks for that one ;)_

Saturn never knew what possessed her to do it. Pluto had refused outright, and Saturn had seriously considered doing the same. However, one look at her princess' pouting face and puppy dog eyes had convinced her. So here she was, at the Senshi's first official press conference. Joy.

It had been decided that telling the public that Saturn could destroy the world in an instant was not the best idea. So she had just been touted as the senshi of rebirth, and the death part was mostly glossed over. That was fine with her. So Saturn did her best not to fall asleep while her leader droned on about destiny and battles. She was suddenly jerked awake when question period began.

As the questions came and she was not required to answer any, she grew complacent. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad...

"I have one for Miss Saturn, if she wouldn't mind."

Saturn thought some words her adoptive parents wouldn't appreciate, berating herself for tempting fate. "Sure. I'd be glad to help you become informed."

"It was mentioned that you are the Senshi of Death, as well as Rebirth, am I correct?"

"Yes, that is one of my domains."

"So why do you pack a glaive?"

"...Excuse me?"

"I mean, if you are of the domain Death, wouldn't it be appropriate to pack a scythe? After all, isn't that what Death is _supposed_ to pack?"

"Well, you see..."

"Besides, Saturn is the ancient god of farming. How does a glaive help for farming? So wouldn't a scythe be a better weapon?"

By now Saturn was steaming. She LIKED her glaive! She was the only one of the Senshi with a real weapon! Unless, of course, you counted Uranus' space sword. Saturn didn't. She had yet to tell Uranus that, though. Besides, a scythe is for a hooded, sneaky death. Saturn was a proud warrior, and stood tall, letting her enemies know who was bringing their doom to them.

"This glaive has magical properties. Besides, a scythe is a farming implement. I am not a farmer. I am a warrior. I do not mow down life, only deliver an ending to those deserving of meeting fate and raising those who shouldn't have been touched by Death. I am the deliverer, not the collector."

Saturn was rather proud of her speech. In class impromptu speaking had always made her nauseous.

"But how are you qualified to choose who gets to die and who doesn't? Who made you judge? Saturn was never known for great wisdom. After all, Saturn ate his own kids, and then got tricked into throwing them up. Plus, he got overthrown. Besides, doesn't Pluto have control over death too? That's what mythology says should happen. You should really think about investing in a scythe..."

"No. End of discussion."

The man sighed theatrically. "I suppose I should have expected that sort of refusal from you. The Senshi as a whole seem incapable of picking appropriate weapons. I mean seriously, what is up with that giant key the missing one packs? Who fights with a key? The sword is rather cool, I'll admit. Better than most of the 'weapons' you pack around. A mirror is not a weapon. What would it be used to do, beat the enemy over the head like a club?"

The other senshi, most of whom were as annoyed at being questioned as Saturn, had quit laughing. They were still in shock from this man daring to question how they fought. Saturn's anger had worked well past her shock at being spoken to like that. Had she been any other Senshi, except possibly Pluto, she would have already visited retribution on this man's impertinent head. But he wasn't done yet.

"Then we have the other group of you. The flaming bow is pretty sweet, I will admit, but dreadfully inefficient against more than one opponent. Venus recently gave up her wicked cool chain for an attack quoted as being called 'Love and Beauty Shock'. Really, people, really? It's pretty destructive for a blown kiss. Makes Venus seem more like a black widow than anything. And Jupiter has 'Jupiter Oak Evolution'. Which sounds like something a Pokémon would do. How does that even work? At least the thunderbolts made some sense for doing damage. I rank it only slightly higher than Venus' attack. And do I really need to say anything about Mercury's attack? It's a bloody harp!"

Mercury was luckily distracted from hearing what was said about her powers due to the fact that she was trying to restrain both Jupiter and Mars from showing this disbeliever just how powerful they could be. Venus was busy mentally killing the man in an attempt to keep from doing it in real life. Still he opened his mouth and went on.

"As for your 'leader' and her boy toy" The entire audience caught their breath. He surely wouldn't dare... "What sort of wussy attack is a rose? I don't even count those AS weapons. All they're good for is distracting people anyways. Sailor Moon, on the other hand, has had a whole slew of weapons. Starting with that tiara... no, let's start at the very beginning, with the hair bobs. Then the Tiara, then that Moon Rod thing, then a sceptre, then some heart ended thing that is only ever referred to as a rod, then a frickin' kaleidoscope, then that tierce, or whatever. She's the leader, but she can't attack. All of her so called 'attacks' are just healing power. Puh-lease. Still, at least that represents her appropriately. Wonder what the flowers say about Tuxedo Kamen...."

Saturn was near hyperventilating. How DARE this man assume he could say such things to the monarchs! He well and truly deserved chastisement.

"And as for the little one, Chibi Moon, what is she even doing fighting? She's just a foolish little kid..."

Saturn was through listening. She hadn't wanted come, but had. She hadn't wanted to be mentioned, but had. She hadn't wanted to be questioned, but she had. The questions had led to the insults tossed at her, her comrades, and her monarchs. Now he had mentionedher best friend. And now she'd had _enough_.

"That's it! Silence Wall! Silent Glaive Surprise!"

Everyone gaped, watching as the world around them fell away. Sailor Moon had suspected that the Armageddon that she was supposed to correct was to be coming soon, but hadn't expected it to be an act of Saturn's. The cynic, however, was in a dead faint on the floor, no longer doubting her powers. She walked over and jabbed him with the staff end. He woke up slowly.

"For the record, Saturn is not really the god of growing things. That's Ceres. Saturn is the god of the HARVEST!" With that, she put him back to sleep.

Sailor Moon shook her head. "I didn't even realize you HAD a temper, Saturn. Not the best way to show it."

"No, but it was necessary." The senshi turned in surprise to the voice of the one who had decided not to show up at the press conference today. Pluto looked back at them with a smile.

"She's the Goddess of REBIRTH, Princess. Trust me, it was way better that she showed her power than we let the humans cause the death of the planet. This way you just have to wake it up, not rebuild it."

Pluto looked around her uninterestedly. "Anyways, my castle is nicer than this place. What say we head over there for some lunch, and I'll explain?"

Sailor Moon brightened at the thought of lunch. After all, if she had a planet to raise, she didn't want it to be on an empty stomach.

* * *


End file.
